Go Bucks?

I have become a bitter, nasty little OSU fan.

I am not sure when this happened. I think it was somewhere in between the 2002 National Championship and this year’s preseason #1 ranking. Right smack in the middle of double-digit winning seasons. Here’s what I mean:

I was walking through a grocery store in Cincinnati and I saw some Paul or Mitch walking by with his trolley wearing an OSU sweatshirt. I immediately snarled and mumbled under my breath ‘nice gear clown shoes, did you buy that from Meijer last week?’

Now that comment is pretentious, presumptuous and plain mean. I don’t know the background of this poor fellow. Maybe his is an alumnus of The Ohio State University. Maybe he grew up in Columbus and his first memories were his dad chasing him with a switch after OSU blew a late lead. Maybe he is Jim Tressel’s bastard son. Either way, I know nothing about this man and his push cart filled with frozen delights.

Regardless, I immediately classified him as a fair-weather slob who jumped on the comfy OSU bandwagon. It’s a smooth ride on this truck and everyone with a $20 Meijer gift card is invited. I hate this man. He’s sucking up to MY team. Yelling foolish remarks at the OSU players that I root for. Get your own team.

And my disdain is not limited to fans in Cincinnati. Even in Columbus, the eye of the Scarlet and Gray storm, I look down my nose at these ‘OSU fans’. When did they start cheering for the team? Last week? Last year? 2002? Do they know who Carlos Snow is? I think not.

What has happened to me? Pre-2002 National Championship, I loved everyone wearing the team colors. Hell, I would hug strangers that were simply wearing a red shirt. I remember the knowing nods I would give other people on sidewalks that had OSU across their chest. We were in this TOGETHER!

Not anymore. The last time I felt good about my ridiculous OSU pride was in Iowa City, this past October. OSU was playing Iowa and only a few thousand OSU fans could score tickets to that game. You could barely make out a few specks of red in the angry mob of yellow. We were pilgrims in an unholy land. Or so I thought. And I beat my Buckeye chest hard and loud.

And now, once again, I am just one of the many. It’s not special to be an OSU fan anymore. I missed being part of the minority. It seemed cooler then.

And really, I am just one of those jerks that wants to be wearing the stylish trucker hat when only the select elite in Hollywood are wearing them. And all my friends point and mock at my attire but this strengthens me because I know that I am on the forefront of something cool and they are too square and slow to realize it yet. And as soon as the fad hits the masses I will discard the hat and move on to something else. Basically, I am a complete loser.

So to summarize, the OSU Buckeyes, my favorite football team since I was old enough to understand what that meant, are at the pinnacle of success. And I could not be more miserable.

42-39

I guess this is what winning – and winning consistently – does to you. I never felt the fear during the OSU-Michigan game. I never considered a Buckeye loss. It was not fathomable. And afterwards I was not so much euphoric as I was full, like I just stuffed myself at a buffet. I did not want to celebrate – I wanted to take a nap.

The game was great. The action moved and for once, I did not even notice the awful TV timeouts. The surroundings were too sparkling to notice. And I love when games start in the day time and end at night. It gives the contest the feel of a play, with two distinct acts. The noise level was where it needed to be and at all the right spots. We had been there before.

After the game my dad and I watched the college kids storm the field. I took a mental picture and remembered to soak it in. It did not come naturally.

Walking to my car the people we weaved through seemed subdued. It had been a long day. 8 hours of drinking and 81 points sucks it out of people. Though we were on the peaceful side of the moon – we never braved the Lane Avenue melee.

So now OSU is going to play Southern California (USC is going to win out and they will vault Michigan) in 50 days. I am not sure what is worse – the 2 ½ month layoff or the fact the game plays on a Monday night. I just hope I will learn to enjoy this more in a couple days. Right now I am just empty and wondering how long OSU can stay on top.

This is what happens when you root for Goliath.