Reds talk from the new me

I caught myself being a consistent asshole to one of my friends. I validated my behavior by telling myself that I was "over-the-top" in my verbal strikes so he could only conclude that I was joking. I also thought my shtick was hilarious. But in my constant effort to amuse myself the insults I lobbed towards my friends face had disintegrated into something plain mean. So I am making amends.

To that end, I have decided to offer an analysis of the 2007 Cincinnati Reds campaign with an edge of positiveity and hope. It is easy to slam and tear something down. That's why the people that construct buildings get paid a lot more than the people that tear them down. And it is easy to write when the intentions are destructive. Enter in any subject matter into Google and you will be provided links to sites dedicated to pinpointing why that subject matter sucks.

I love nothing more than a long session of complaining. My harping has been loud and predictable during the Reds disastrous May (9-20). In defiance, I decided I wanted to Reds to lose 120 games. If a team is going to lose, they might as well be glorious losers. But those were efforts to insulate myself from the pain. The truth is that I am a fan. I clicked on the game Tuesday night and pumped my fist as the Reds escaped with the aide of a bases loaded double play for a 2-1 win. I want the Reds to win.

However, realistic playoff hopes ended when the Reds went 2-6 on a home stand against two of the worst teams in the National League. Now, record-wise, the Reds are the worst team. Teams look forward to series against the Reds. The team just cannot put together a complete baseball game. So these are my kind suggestions on how to fix this ball club:

1. Trade Ken Griffey Jr. – great, bold idea that never quite worked. 10 years of running down balls on the Kingdome AstroTurf killed Griffey's legs. He came to Reds with a broken body and has not been the superstar everyone wanted him to be. But he is a professional, he never trashes the Reds organization or his teammates and he wants to win. He just does not fit on this team or in this town. He hustles when he wants to and he is not the vocal leader the Reds need. And he makes too much money for a slow, injury-prone right-fielder. So trade him and trade him now because he is swinging a good bat and is as healthy as he will ever be for the rest of his life. I just fear that the Reds will keep him around so he can hit his 600th HR and pump the gate for a few weeks. This would be short-sighted. And very possible.

2. Trade Adam Dunn – he could be a great DH. He's going to average close to 40 hrs, 100 walks, 100 runs and 100 RBI for the next 5 years. But the National League does not have a DH and never will. So that's a problem. I don't think Dunn likes playing defense – I sense disdain as he lumbers after balls in the left field corner. So let's make everybody happy. Dunn does not hit balls to the warning track – outfielders do not even move when he connects. They just turn and watch. So send him to an American League team with disposable cash and a big park. His bombs are so majestic that they won't even notice the 180 strike outs for a couple years. And the Reds ball park is so small that they don't need a guy that can hit the ball 500 feet. They need a guy that hits .300 with runners in scoring position.

3. Release all relievers over the age of 33. Well, maybe keep one over that age. Having a 38-year old David Weathers on the staff is ok if it is an exception, not the rule. The Reds started the season too dependant on pitchers in the high 30s. The Reds need an arm youth movement. If Bray and Majewski, the Reds take in last year's infamous trade with the Nationals, pitch to their potential, the bullpen is halfway there.

4. Cut the chord on 2007 sooner than later and bring up the young talent. The Reds have won 3 games in a row. That is pleasant. They could play .500 ball, from this point, the rest of the season. And since the National League Central is historically terrible, that level of play might keep them hanging around. But the Reds should know that if the Central teams collapse and allow the 6th place horse to catch them around the turn, they will not win a playoff series. This team cannot beat the Braves or Dodgers or Mets in October. So what is the point of killing yourself to make the playoffs this year? The Reds should focus on 2008 and make deals to that end. Harang, Arroyo, Phillips and Hamilton are the only untouchables.

5. Raise the outfield walls. I wish the Reds would just detonate the entire stadium and start from scratch. The ball park is comfortable and that is about it. The opportunity to create a professional facility only comes around once every 20-30 years. And the Reds just did not get it right. Whatever. In the meantime, they could at least make it less of a launching pad. Raising the walls would only eliminate a few hundred seats, but it is not like attendance is not pushing the edges of capacity.

I hope those were positive suggestions. I want the Reds to rip off wins and get back in the conversation this season. I don't want to wait. I don't want another 5-year plan. But the sane man knows that 2007 is gone. Time to trim the fat, let loose the youth and bring back the love. Let's all smile again, friends.