All right, here this

Let's get to some blogging. My parents asked me what a 'blog' was the other day - I tried to explain and quickly saw the look of boredom roll over their faces. Hopefully, this website will not generate the same feelings for you.
I feel like I have been in preparation for this moment for years. The journey has been long and now I am here - and frankly, I am not sure what to do with myself.
I have learned a few lessons the past few days. LESSON 1: 'Don't write an email to people you work with when you are furious'. As of Wednesday morning, it was looking like I was not going to be able to go on this trip. Essentially, my company decided (for good reason) that the security situation in Papua New Guinea (PNG) was too volatile for me to travel there. I had a grown-up temper tantrum and sent a scathing email to a number of people. Let's just say that I was 'checked' following my misguided editorial.
Regardless, everything fell into place at the final hour. Now I actually have to go on the trip. (loud, gurgling gulping noise).
I have discovered a new game. I can only travel with 60 pounds of luggage. You know, because 65 would be criminal. Anyway, I stand on the scale and record my weight (190 lbs for those curious). Then I grab up all my bags and check out the poundage. Naturally, I am over. Then I start making cuts. First to go: underwear and deodorant. Just useless space fillers.
My itinerary is fun. Chicago - London - Bangkok - Sydney - Brisbane (AUS) - Port Moseby (PNG) - Madang (final destination). 3 days. 8 stops. 4 continents. 57 different flight attendants. not good times.
However, I will be making notes along the way. By the 30th hour of this sojourn, I should be in a delicious lucid trance usually only achieved by the help of mescaline. Hunter Thompson would be so proud. Stay tuned.
I don't think they server free booze on international planes anymore. This is probably a good thing. Otherwise, I would be showing up for my first day on 3 days of intermittent sleep and a gallon of dirty vodka. Basically, it would be like starting a job in the middle of spring break in Cancun.
Eat a peach. MDB.